You Don’t Have to Be Perfect to Help Someone Heal
- Marcie O
- Jun 26, 2025
- 8 min read
A raw look at my life coaching journey—mess, magic, and all.
Last year, I completed my life coaching course through a QLS-endorsed program. My vision was clear: to help people find themselves, feel empowered, set goals, and actually reach them. I pictured colorful worksheets, powerful affirmations, and clients feeling seen for the first time in ages.
And then... life happened. My path unexpectedly veered through significant illness, pain, and depression. This wasn't just "busy"; it was a deeply disorienting time that made me question everything. Despite having the certification, the techniques, and the desire to help, I found myself wrestling with a core doubt: how could I possibly guide others when I felt stuck, hurting, and barely holding myself together?
But here's what I've realized.
Coaches Aren’t Supposed to Be Perfect
There’s this tired, glitter-dusted myth floating around: that life coaches are these ultra-evolved beings who live in spotless apartments full of white walls, houseplants, and crystal energy. That we wake up at 5 a.m. to drink green juice, do hot yoga, meditate for 30 minutes, and speak only in affirmations. That our lives are perfectly planned Pinterest boards and our problems get solved with vision boards and a smile.
Yeah… no.
That’s not real life—and that’s definitely not me.
I’ve cried in public restrooms. I’ve slept on a couch for months. I’ve lost weight and gained it back. I’ve avoided mirrors. I’ve pushed through chronic pain just to get through a day. And I’ve still shown up for people with my whole heart.
The truth is: Life coaches aren’t meant to be perfect. We’re meant to be present.
We’re meant to be human guides—honest, messy, compassionate people who have walked through the fire and are willing to walk with you while you figure your path out. Not above you, not behind you—with you.
So before I tell you more about how I coach and what I offer, let’s break down what life coaching really is—and what it isn’t—because the world has it twisted.
What Is a Life Coach, Really?
Okay, let’s clear this up once and for all:
A life coach is not a therapist. We don’t diagnose trauma, anxiety, ADHD, or anything else that’s rooted in your past—though many of us have lived through those very things ourselves. Therapy often focuses on healing old wounds.
Life coaching is about what’s next.
It’s about moving forward from where you are right now, toward where you want to be. Even if you don’t know what that looks like yet.
Think of a life coach as a personal trainer—but for your soul, your mindset, and your motivation. We don’t just cheer you on; we help you build real strategies so you don’t burn out or give up when things get hard.
Here’s what life coaching can help you do:
Clarify your goals—even the ones you’re too scared to say out loud
Build real self-trust and confidence in your own voice
Create doable, personalized action plans that make space for your actual life
Stay accountable without shame or guilt
Navigate setbacks like a human, not a robot
Celebrate every step, because small wins count, especially when life is heavy
Some coaches focus on relationships. Some on careers. Some on fitness, money, business.
Me? I’m all about reclamation—of your body, your confidence, your identity, and your right to feel joy again.
My coaching blends:
Body kindness and self-love (even when it’s hard)
Mindset work that doesn’t ignore mental illness
Expression through makeup, movement, music—whatever speaks to you
Gentle guidance through your big, messy dreams
Yes, I’ve studied meal planning, movement coaching, productivity systems—and I can help with those things. But honestly? My focus isn’t just your habits. My focus is you. All of you. Even the parts you hide. Especially those.
And unlike therapy, which is about recovery, life coaching is about transformation. From stuck to steady. From surviving to creating. From “I guess this is who I am” to “I get to decide what comes next.”
Why I Almost Gave Up on Coaching
When I finished my life coaching certification, I felt this surge of power. Not the fake kind you put on for others, but the deep, hard-won kind—the kind that says, I’ve been through it, and now I’m ready to help someone else find their way too. I was proud of myself. I felt capable, excited, and ready to finally build a business rooted in meaning. I wanted to help people create lives they didn’t feel the need to run away from.
But then life—real life—hit back harder than I expected.
The bills didn’t stop just because I had a new certification. Chronic pain didn’t magically disappear because I believed in mindset work. Depression, grief, and illness came crashing in like waves I couldn’t outrun. After repeated COVID infections and months of being sick in a household where quarantining wasn’t an option, my energy vanished. My body changed again. The weight I had worked so hard to lose slowly came back. And my dreams of coaching had to be shelved while I took on any job that would help me stay afloat—tax prep, odd gigs, whatever paid. I was even living on a couch, surrounded by reminders that my life didn’t look like the “professional” image people expect from a coach.
And that’s when the doubt crept in—quiet at first, then louder. Who would ever take advice from someone like me? How can I guide someone else when I feel lost myself? Why should anyone trust a coach who’s technically homeless?
But here’s what I’ve come to understand: That voice? It wasn’t truth. It was fear—dressed up in shame and perfectionism.
Because here’s my truth: I’ve been the girl working two jobs and still not making rent. I’ve stood in front of a mirror not recognizing my body, hating what I saw, and still putting on blush and a brave face. I’ve been up at 2 a.m. googling, “how to get your life together,” because I was so overwhelmed I didn’t know where to start. And that’s what makes me a powerful coach. Not because I’ve got it all figured out—but because I’ve been there, and I’m still standing. Still trying. Still choosing to show up.
Leading While Learning
Let’s be real: I’m still healing. I still have bad days—physically, mentally, emotionally. My joints still ache. My mind still spirals. I still doubt myself, forget things, cry when no one’s looking. I haven’t “arrived” at some perfect place—and I don’t think I ever will. But I’ve learned that healing and helping can coexist. That you don’t have to be a finished product to offer someone else a hand.
Because while I’m still a work in progress, I’ve also done the work. I’ve studied models like GROW and frameworks like the Wheel of Life and SWOT analysis. I’ve learned how to break down big, overwhelming goals into tiny, manageable steps that actually make sense for real people with real struggles. I’ve spent hours practicing how to hold space—without judgment, without rushing to fix, just sitting with someone’s story and offering gentle guidance forward.
But beyond the textbooks and techniques, I’ve lived the truth of what it means to rebuild.
I know what it feels like to lose 20 inches from your body and gain confidence, only to watch it unravel again due to illness or burnout—and then have to start over from scratch. I’ve stared down hopelessness and chosen, again and again, to believe in possibility. Even when it hurt. Especially when it hurt.
That’s what leadership looks like to me.
Not perfection, but persistence.
Not pretending to have all the answers, but being willing to walk beside someone as they search for their own.
Why I’m Showing Up Now
I could wait. I could wait until I have my own home again. Until I’m glowing from the inside out, dressed in chic pastels, with a Pinterest-worthy office and a perfectly lit vision board behind me. I could wait until I feel like “enough.”
But waiting for perfect would be a lie.
Because life—the real, gritty, painful, miraculous life we’re all living—isn’t filtered.
And maybe, just maybe, you don’t need a coach who looks like a magazine ad.
Maybe you need someone like me.
Someone who knows what it’s like to cry over a shirt that doesn’t fit anymore.
To use makeup as both a mask and art.
To love deeply, fiercely, but struggle to show up for herself.
To be in a relationship that’s layered and messy and still choose to care for others while figuring out how to care for yourself.
So I’m showing up now—not because I’m perfect, but because I’m present.
Not because I have a flawless routine or six-figure business, but because I believe in people who are still in the middle of their story. Because I know what it’s like to feel invisible. And I want you to know: you don’t have to wait until you’re “ready” to start again.
I’ve worn a lot of hats: manager, tutor, fast food worker, model, call center rep. I’ve helped coworkers through breakdowns. I once gave an employee a Christmas tree and decorations because she had nothing to bring home to her kids. I’ve earned my Associate’s degree. I’ve studied IT and earned my Google certificate. I’ve finished my life coaching courses, even when my life was in shambles.
And even now—still healing, still rebuilding—I know I have something powerful to offer.
So if you’re here too—hurting but hopeful—know that you’re not alone.
I see you. I am you.
And together, we can take the next step.
Let’s Grow Together
If anything in this post touched your heart, stayed in your mind, or whispered “this is for me”—then I made something just for you.
It’s a small but powerful tool:
👉🏾 Free Reflection Worksheet with Affirmations –
Inside, you’ll find a few gentle but grounding questions—just enough to help you pause, breathe, and check in with yourself. Whether you’re feeling stuck, overwhelmed, or just unsure where to begin, these prompts are a first step. A small step. But sometimes, that’s all it takes to shift your perspective and remind yourself that you’re allowed to evolve.
And because this space isn’t just mine—it’s ours—I want your voice in the room too.
Would you be interested in something like:
Group coaching circles where we support each other and share tools?
1-on-1 chats where you get personal attention and gentle accountability?
A cozy, private space for check-ins, celebration, and real talk?
Your feedback means the world to me. You can drop a comment, send a DM, or even email me. However you feel safest showing up, I’ll meet you there. I’m building this community with you, not just for you. And your voice matters.
From One Work-in-Progress to Another
You don’t need to have it all figured out to help someone else find their footing.
You don’t need to be fearless or flawless or even fully healed to hold space for growth.
What you do need is heart. Honesty. Empathy.
The willingness to show up even when you feel messy or unsure.
That’s what I’m doing here—imperfectly, but intentionally.
Not with a script or a spotlight, but with a soft voice that says, “You’re not alone.”
Maybe you’ve been waiting for the right moment to start over. Maybe you’ve felt like you’re too far gone, too broken, too late to begin again. But I’m here to tell you: you’re not.
There’s power in showing up as you are.
There’s healing in being seen without filters.
And there’s magic in walking forward—together.
So if you’re ready (or almost ready), I’ll be right here.
Walking beside you. Cheering you on.
Through the mess. Through the magic. Through it all.
Let’s grow—not perfectly, but powerfully.
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